When googling how to improve one’s mental health you are hit with a myriad of suggestions from getting more sleep to exercising and eating well – suggestions that encourage solitude and silence. Whilst these are great tips for simply living a better life, it is difficult to solve mental health issues with only these techniques. Recently, too, there has been an increase in potions and formulas that are condescendingly marketed as being able to solve one’s mental health issues after a single application: ‘self-care’ days consisting of bubble baths and the use of one over-priced sheet mask will not solve the negative feelings you feel inside, no matter how many products are advertised as having this magic healing power. For me, talking is one of the most powerful coping mechanisms out there; being open about my own feelings and encouraging others to do the same (and let me know exactly what they are feeling at any given time) has helped me to create an open environment that prioritises our inner thoughts and feelings above all else.
In 2018, Ban.do’s founder Jen Gotch teamed up with jewellery brand Iconery to create a selection of nameplate necklaces that read “anxiety” and “depression”. The necklaces caused social media users to criticise the brand, claiming that it seemed as if they were trying to romanticize mental illnesses and not take them seriously. The inspiration for the products, however, according to Gotch’s personal message on the shopping page for the necklaces was to “serve as a conversation starter for people to be more open about what’s going on in their minds”. Despite the criticism that these necklaces received, I felt revitalised by the concept of literally wearing a conversation topic on one’s chest; gone were the days of having to find the “right” time to discuss sensitive issues, here was an accessory that encouraged openness and discussion through its mere existence around the wearers neck.
Jen Gotch was open about her own struggles with mental health issues whilst discussing her decision to create these necklaces, in fact their very existence was rooted in the struggles of the creator who hoped that, through her creations, other people perhaps wouldn’t have to feel as alone as she once had. Not only did the necklaces encourage conversation, but all the proceeds of the products went to Bring Change to Mind, a non-profit organisation focused on ending the negative stigma around mental health issues. Recently I felt very aware of how oversaturated the wellness market is with seemingly useless products, and set out to find brands that, similar to Gotch and her necklace, genuinely believe in the magic of conversation and the necessity to normalise discussions of tricky topics.
My search led me to Pjoys – a brand that creates luxury pyjamas that not only supports mental health charities, but one that understands the ugly side to mental health issues and aims to make those moments as comfortable as possible for those who need support. Pjoys co-founder Michelle Morgan told me via email that “When I first became unwell and about to step out of my business to get treatment and get better, I was told that it was awkward when I talked about my mental health. That was crushing and silencing.” so what did she do? “I decided I was going to take ownership over that awkward moment and step into, and stay, in that space and start talking about my experience of mental illness and recovery. When I take ownership of my awkward, it helps the person I’m talking to take ownership of theirs. We’re all the better for it”. Taking inspiration from the pyjamas she often found herself unable to get out of, she wanted to focus conversation on the feelings that lead to needing a pyjama day; when it is important to get help, and why it is important to be more open about these negative feelings.
Michelle realised that her experience of illness was not purely specific to her, and that other people often struggle in similar ways. Creating a brand that champions conversation about mental health has allowed Michelle to create more “that’s me” moments – moments where the words you are struggling to form are able to find you, and help you cope. Michelle’s own “that’s me” moment happened when reading Ruby Wax’s description of her depression in her book Frazzled. Being able to recognise her own symptoms in those of someone else is what got Michelle to her GP and on the road to recovery. This highlights the importance of discussion and openness in helping others overcome their demons too – in talking about our own experiences and normalising what we are going through, we simultaneously help ourselves on the road towards recovery and help others. Pjoys don’t just create beautiful pyjamas (their limited-edition PJ’s are designed by contemporary artists from across the globe) they wholeheartedly believe in everything they stand for, with Michelle telling me that she knows that “talking, asking for help and accepting help will propel people towards recovery more quickly. Let’s talk more, own our awkward and create a movement of people unafraid to talk about mental health and illness”. So, lets wear our pyjamas with pride, lets acknowledge our own feelings and the feelings of others brazenly and unapologetically. Let’s change the world, one set of pyjamas at a time.
This story was written for Boyfriend Magazine issue 9. Buy the issue here: https://boyfriend-mag.com/product/boyfriend-magazine-issue-9-january-2020-digital-copy/
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